The Gonzo Journals
January 24th, 2023
Today is one of those extra special days when I’ve decided to have a second cup of coffee. I couldn’t help it! I was already at the neighborhood 7/11 getting gas for the truck and a gallon of milk – 7/11 brand. I can imagine it’s healthy, right? – and the scalding nectar was fingering my nose (In a non-sexual way. Think Bugs Bunny). Anyways, I’m all riled up and my fingers are jittery. Might as well create something!
There’s been a lot of discussion in the indie horror community on social media lately about who is the most violent. Some of those times, the person who creates the post claims the title. Nope, that’s not narcissistic at all, right? No one is allowed to say this about themselves. It’s like a nick name. You can’t grant yourself one because it sounds cool. Others must do this for you, even though most times it’s something negative or funny. Not cool. I doubt very seriously anyone has ever called themselves Farty McFarterson.
Anyway, here are five indie horror authors – in no particular order – who I believe are the most disgusting, vile, yet talented writers on the face of the planet. If you’re an indie horror author and you passionately believe I left you off this list, it may be because you have a SHIT attitude. I’ll read the works of poons, but I’ll never give them free advertisement. Also, write your own fucking blog. This one is mine.
Here we go…
Patrick Harrison III aka PC3
Patrick Harrison III was the very first Splatterpunk author I ever read. His initial offering, Inferno Bound and the Hell Hounds, captivated me. I asked myself repeatedly “are we allowed to write like this”? That answer is yes, we are. No matter how much the Goodread’s Soccer Mom Review Club says we can’t, we totally can. One of his most recent novellas titled Grandpappy made me cringe for hours on an airplane. The people surrounding me kept staring at the cover with disgusted faces because it displayed an old man’s discolored, infected toenail. Perhaps it reminded them too much of their own feet. Here is the synopsis:
Grandpappy is on hospice.
Charles is going mad.
Vile happenings are abound.
You, reader, are not prepared.
This is your lesson in depravity.
He gives you every chance to not pick up the book. Swallow and grab it anyway.
When I was first contracted to write my Splatter Western novella Starving Zoe, I reached out to the community for assistance with who to read as influence. I was still very new to Splatterpunk and needed a helping hand on which way to go. It was bad enough I was writing a damned western, which I’d never even thought of doing, not to mention I had to make it extreme horror. I mean, who does that? Most pointed me in the direction of Header, and I’m glad they did. This book was made into a low budget, rare horror film many years ago and, even though I own it, I’ve never watched it to this day. Instead, I learned from the book what a ‘Header’ really is. The synopsis is as follows:
The ultimate revenge.
Set deep in the untamed backwoods of Virginia, HEADER depicts the collision course between ATF Agent Stewart Cummings and ex-con Travis Clyde Tuckton. Stew’s sickly wife puts a major strain on his wallet, forcing him to traffic drugs to make ends meet. Meanwhile, Travis returns to live with Pappy Martin, who mentors him about family feuds, sexual perversion, and most importantly, how to exact revenge on one’s enemies. Desperation, rape, and murder spiral out of control triggering a hellish conclusion that defies description.
Oh, I could describe it, but I won’t. That is entirely up to you. I ended up with Ed at KillerCon 2019 when he received a lifetime achievement award. I was so star struck I didn’t have the nerve to speak to him. A year later, my wife managed to track down a DVD copy of the film Header and he signed it for my birthday. I refuse to even open the case.
I’m not entirely sure if the photograph above is actually Duncan Ralson because I’ve never met him. It’s what he displays on his social media accounts, so I’ll just run with it. Unlike Ed Lee, Duncan has a massive social media presence, and he uses it to annoy the straits – and some who pretend from time to time that they’re NOT one of the straits – almost daily. Being a professional asshole myself, I can appreciate this! There have been a ton of both positive and negative hype surrounding his novella Woom. The synopsis is as follows:
“Trust me when I say, this is messed up.” – MATT SHAW, author of Sick B*stards.
“I believe pain lingers,” Angel said. “Do I believe in spirits? In the supernatural? Probably not.”
The Lonely Motel holds many dark secrets… and Room 6 just might possess the worst of them all.
Angel knows all about pain. His mother died in this room. He’s researched its history. Today he’s come back to end it, no matter the cost, once and for all.
Shyla, a plus-sized escort, thinks the stories Angel tells her can’t be true. Secrets so vile, you won’t want to let them inside you.
But the Lonely Motel doesn’t forget. It doesn’t forgive. And it always claims its victim.
“This book is a wet dream of abnormal sexual psychology.” – Mort Stone, My Indie Muse
WARNING: Don’t buy this book if you have a weak stomach, if you’re easily disturbed, or if you’re looking for a light horror read. THIS IS NOT THAT BOOK. Seriously. You’ve been warned.
Yeah, yeah, I’d heard all this bullshit before from every “extreme” author who releases a Kindle chap book because all their friends won’t shut the fuck up about it. That’s who raves most about these indie authors. Their friends, and maybe their mothers. I know because we can smell our own! Not Duncan, though. Have you seen the number of reviews for this book? It’s an Amazon Best Seller! I expected to be completely let down, but I was shocked into reading the entire thing in one sitting. I’d never experienced ‘trash’ so beautifully written! It’s a masterpiece.
When this book was released, people within the extreme horror community and the horror community in general wouldn’t shut up about it. People who claimed to be horror fans tried to cancel this guy for the lines he crossed in his book titled Dead Inside. At first, my suggestion to them was to go back to Forks, Washington for more sparkly vampire offerings, but then I read it. Holy shit. I was going through a phase where I’d read books while eating dinner. I don’t recommend this, especially while reading any of Mr. Morrison’s work. It was the one and only time I’ve almost vomited while reading a book! The biggest problem was that I don’t believe it had anything to do with me eating. The synopsis is as follows:
A young hospital security guard with a disturbingly unique taste in women. A maternity doctor with a horrifically unusual appetite. When the two of them meet, they embark on a journey of self-discovery while shattering societal norms and engaging in destructively aberrant behavior. As they unwittingly help each other understand a world in which neither seems to belong, they begin to realize what it truly means to be alive…And that it might not always be a good thing.
Even though this book came out a few years ago, it is still mentioned to this day whenever someone brings up the subject of the ‘most disgusting book on the market’. I’m sure there are more, but this one is a REAL book, not something blogged on a juvenile wannabe website (like mine! lol). This was quite possibly the most offensive book I’d read until I was introduced to the final author on this list…
B. L. Blankenship
This guy. Geez, this guy. When he first reached out to me inquiring about my involvement in the Extreme Western Horror genre, I had no idea I was going to be exposed to something that put my own work to shame. People have thrown up in their mouth and tried to claim I was a racist, a rapist, a misogynist, and a baby killer all due to the character I created in Starving Zoe, but it all takes a back seat to the shit I experienced in The Confederado. The synopsis is as follows:
It was the rainy season when the lone Confederado descended upon the small MesoAmerican village. Unbeknownst to him, he’d just left one war to partake in another. In “The Confederado: A Western Horror Tale of MesoAmerican Gore” you’ll journey alongside the Southern Rebel Gunter. He believed himself to be a warrior who’d never come across an enemy that he couldn’t kill or a woman he couldn’t fulfill.
Come with him as he faces throngs of nude and scantily clad Amazonian savage women, fierce sex-crazed witches, and cannibals in this SplatterWestern odyssey of Latin lust and murderous carnage.
WARNING: This book is highly sexualized and horrifically violent. It is not suitable for all audiences. We are not responsible for what this may do to the minds of our readers.
Recently, a podcast with very few listeners bashed the living fuck out of this book. Come to find out, neither of the half-assed hosts had ever read anything to use as a basis of comparison. Mostly, those who want to write but can’t, review…and review poorly. They’re overly critical and obviously pissed off they don’t possess the talent to join the ranks of literary greatness. After speaking to Blankenship, the thing that trips me out the most is that he’s regularly active in his church. He’s an active preacher! Now that, my friends, is a church I’d attend!
There you have it! These are the top five indie extreme horror authors I’d recommend to anyone who wanted to test the waters of gore and violence. After all, it’s just a book, right? It doesn’t define who you are as a person, nor does it mean you’ll go to Hell, directly to Hell, not pass ‘GO’, and not collect two hundred dollars for reading it. Puff up those balls you won in that ‘true horror fan’ social media crane machine and show them all what you’re truly made of. I dare you…