(Written a very long time ago as a “Sister Christian” spoof for musician Tommy Cross. Never recorded or even played live for all I know. Sorry for the ‘gay’ line. Like I said, written a very long time ago…)
Hipster Christian Why you look so dumb? I can’t believe I’m not the only one To say, you’re gay Where you going What you looking for Buying vinyl At the record stores, no clue It’s true
Man, you know Your beard grew way too fast Your wife is worrying You’re far too gone To save, just shave Hipster Christian Wearing Sandal Shoes Don’t you worry Because Jesus wore them too It’s true
(chorus)
Sandal man Your glasses just don’t fit Patchouli smells like shit Get off the 60’s tit Sandal man What’s your price for gas To fill up your Pri-Ass (Prius) And take your kids to mass
C. Derick Miller is an award winning Splatterpunk/Indie/Cult/Horror/Dark Fiction author, Gonzo journalist, freelance A&E journalist, screenwriter, poet, ordained minister, and songwriter born in the town of Greenville, Texas. A seasoned paranormal investigator and administrator for the fine art industry, his influences include Hunter S. Thompson, Kevin Smith, Shawn Mullins, and Del James. He is currently signed with Death’s Head Press and is Sr. Writer/Jr. Producer for AtuA Productions. Chad is also an active member of the International Thriller Writers organization, the Horror Writers Association, and co-host of both the “Butterflies Make Me Angry” and “American Justice” podcasts. He resides in the Bishop Arts District of Dallas, Texas and has a price on his head for his short story “Hell Paso” contained in the #1 Amazon Best Selling/Award Winning Death’s Head Press Anthology “And Hell Followed”. He wishes he was making up that last part but…it’s nice to be wanted.
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